怎麼樣避免婚外情的發生?
治療學家弗蘭克·皮特曼認爲，幾乎所有的婚姻背叛者都會爲自己的出軌深感後悔。
"Infidelity is the most devastating crisis for a family," said Pittman. "It creates an atmosphere of simmering anger, secrets and dishonesty," he says.
皮特曼說：“對於一個家庭來說，不忠是最具毀滅性的危機。它會讓家庭充滿怨恨、猜忌和欺騙。”
Some estimates suggest half of divorces involve infidelity. But Pittman says couples can take preventive steps. Here are some pointers and tips:
據估計，半數離婚都是由不忠造成的。而皮特曼表示，夫妻可以採取一些預防性的措施。以下是一些具體的意見和建議：
1. Stay faithful yourself 自己要保持忠貞
If you don't want your spouse to stray, don't have an affair, either. Many affairs are sparked by revenge.
如果不想配偶出軌，你自己也要忠貞。很多婚外情的產生都緣於報復。
2. Don't marry a cheater 不要嫁給“負心漢”
If your husband strayed from his former wife to be with you, then he could leave you for someone else.
如果你的丈夫背叛了他的前妻和你在一起，那麼他可能也會背叛你和別人在一起。
3. Normalize lust 保持適度的慾望
It's OK to be attracted to other people; just don't act on it. It's also acceptable to let your spouse know you find a celeb attractive. But don't let your eye wander checking out every hottie that walks by.
被別人吸引是正常的，但不要有所行動。讓你的配偶知道你對一個名人很着迷也未嘗不可，但不要讓眼睛總停留在每個從你身邊走過的美女身上。
4. Don't share your marital woes with co-workers 不要將自己婚姻的不幸告訴同事
They may be sick of hearing about it and say "If you don't like her, divorce her", just to be done with it. Or it can pull you and another disgruntled spouse closer together.
他們可能不願意聽你傾訴，爲了敷衍你，他們會說：“如果不愛她了，就離婚吧”。或者，這可能會拉近你和另一個對婚姻狀況不滿的人的關係。
5. If you're thinking about having an affair, the best thing you can do is telling your spouse. 如果你動了搞婚外情的念頭，最明智的做法是告訴你的配偶。
"You can say, 'I have noticed we have not had sex in a year,' " says Pittman. This way they can work on intimacy issues and prevent the affair.
皮特曼建議，“你可以這樣說，‘我覺得我們好像一年都沒有性生活了。’”採用這種方式處理好曖昧關係，可以防止婚外情。
6. Stay off the computer 遠離電腦
If you are intimately connected to someone online, that's a red flag. Focus more on the intimacy in your relationship at home.
如果你和某個網友在網上聯繫密切，這可是個危險信號。把更多的注意力放在家裏和配偶的關係上吧。
