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趣味經典英語笑話

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在日常繁忙的生活中,也不要忘了放鬆自己的心情。下面是本站小編爲大家帶來趣味經典英語笑話,希望大家喜歡!

ing-bottom: 83.75%;">趣味經典英語笑話

趣味經典英語笑話:爲什麼

A cemetery grounds keeper was going about his rounds when he saw a man lying on a grave,

“位墓園管理員在巡視的時候,看見一名男子躺在墳墓上,

sobbing loudly and pounding his fits on the ground,

大聲哭泣,並且用他的拳頭重重地敲打地面.他悲痛地說:

"Why did you have to die?Oh,why?Why?Why?"he lamented.

"你爲什麼一定要死?哦,爲什麼?爲什麼?爲什麼?”

"A loved one's passing is a terrible lose."the grounds keeper offered in consolation,

墓園管理員安慰他說“心愛的人死去是個很難受的損失,

"but someday,the pain will pass."

但是終有一天,傷痛會過去的。”

"Love one?" the weeping man said ,looking up.

這位哭泣的男子擡起頭看着他說:“心愛的人?

" I didn't even know the guy."

我根本不認識這個人。…

"Then why all the tears? "

"那爲什麼要痛哭流涕呢?…"

"He was my wife's first husband!"

"他是我老婆的笫一任老公呀!”

 趣味經典英語笑話:工作中的面試

Reaching the end of a job interview ,

到了工作面試的最後部分,

the personnel recruitment officer asken a young engineer fresh out of Cambridge,

人事招聘主管問一位剛從劍橋 橋畢業的年輕工程師:

" And what starting salary were you looking for?"

“你想要起薪多少呢 ?”

The engineer said,"In the neighborhood of $140,000 a year,depending on the benefits package ."

工程師說 :“太約一年十四萬左右吧,要視整體福利而定。”

The interviewer said,"Well ,what would you say to a package of 5-weeks vacation,

面試主管說:“嗯,五個禮拜的假期,

14 paid holidays,full medical and dental,

十四天帶薪假,全額補助醫療和看牙科,

company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary ,

百分之五十薪資的公司相對退休基金,

and a company car leased every 2 years ,say,a red sports Mercedes? "

每兩年公司租用配車,比如說,紅色的奔馳跑車,你覺得怎幺樣呀?”

The engineer sat up straight and said ,

工程師挺直坐着說:

"Wow!Are you kidding?"

“哇!你在開玩笑吧?”

And the interviewer replied,"Yeah,but you started it."

面試主管回答說 :“對呀。不過是你起頭的呀。”

 趣味經典英語笑話:決不放棄

A government employee found and old brass lamp in a filing cabinet.

有一位政府機關員工在檔案櫃裏面發現一盞老舊的銅製油燈。

When he dusted it off,a genie appeared and granted him three wishes.

當他把它的灰塵除去的時候。有一個精靈出現了 ,並且同意他三個願望。

"I'd love an ice-cold beer right now,"

他告訴精靈 “我現在馬上就要一瓶冰啤酒 。”

he told the genie ! A beer appeared .

砰!一瓶啤酒出現了。

Next the man said," I wish to be on an island,surrounded by becautiful and willing woman."

這個人接着說:“我想要到一個島上, 被甘心樂意的美女圍繞着。”

Poof!He was on an island with gorgeous woman fawning all over him.

砰!他到了一個島上,被美女糾纏着對他獻殷勤。

Oh,this is the life,the guy thought.

這傢伙想着啊,這纔是生活呀。

"I wish I never had to work again."

“我希望我永遠都不必再工作。”

And poof! He was back at his desk in the government office!

砰!他回到他在政府機關的 辦公桌前。

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